Nexus event in Budapest: Conversation, Listening & Jazz Music

Nov 4, 2019Bob, Events, Music3 comments

We had an excellent Nexus jazz event with Kyle Gregory in Budapest on October 20th.  Friends of ours hosted this informal concert/discussion event in their lovely apartment right on the Danube river, with a panoramic view of the city bridges, castle and parliament.  We packed the place out! Kyle joined up with a local bass player Horvath Balazs – one of Hungary’s best – to deliver a delicious platter of jazz from the likes of Miles Davis (All Blues) and Sun Ra (Love in outer space).  The theme of the concert was how we can use jazz music as a metaphor for promting connection, especially through the spontaneity of improvised collective conversation.  Throughout his concert, Kyle wove in 10 insights about the jazz way of conversation (listed below), which we then discussed in small groups afterwards, with an emphasis on how these insights translate into our own conversations.  There was a lot of good storytelling about our own experiences.  (Robert) 

The Jazz Way of Conversation

  • We listen. Listening is primary. Even our own speaking is a listening to our inner voice.
  • We listen to everyone, not just ourselves.
  • As we hear the context, we imagine our voice within it.
  • We follow our promptings coming from the singing voice in our imagination. We don’t reason. It’s intuitive, and inspired. It has a particular quality.
  • We don’t pre-decide what we will say or what direction the music will take. We’re improvising spontaneously.
  • We don’t judge other voices. They are simply given.
  • Our main concern is that our contribution adds expression to the whole group sound, the whole.
  • Often our best choice is to wait and leave space for others.
  • We look for conversation partners who care more about the music than the prominence of their role.
  • Our enjoyment is in the unfolding synergy/togetherness that makes the whole greater than the sum of the parts. It lifts us up. Music speaks of the power of us. 

Gondolatok a Jazz kapcsán

  • Figyeljünk a zenére. A hallgatás elsődleges. Még a saját beszédünk is a “belső hang”  meghallgatása.
  • Mindenkit meghallgatunk, nem csak magunkat.
  • Amint meghalljuk a kontextust, elképzeljük az ehhez kapcsolódó saját hangunkat.
  • A képzeletünkben követjük az énekes hangja által adott ösztönzéseket. Nem gondolkodunk. Intuitívan és inspirációt merítve figyeljük. Különleges minősége van ennek.
  • Nem döntjük el előre, hogy mit fogunk mondani, vagy milyen irányba halad a zene. Spontán módon improvizálunk.
  • Más hangokat nem ítéljük meg, egyszerűen elfogadjuk őket.
  • Legfontosabb aggodalmunk az, hogy hozzájáruljunk az egész csoport hangjához a mi hangunkkal.
  • Gyakran a legjobb választás, ha várunk, és hagyunk helyet másoknak.
  • Olyan beszélgetőpartnereket keresünk, akik inkább a zenével, semmint saját szerepük kiemelével törődnek.
  • Élvezzük a kibontakozó a szinergiákat és összetartozást, amely az egészet nagyobbá teszi, mint a részek összege. Ez felemel minket. Megmutatja a zene hatalmát számunkra.

. . .

A participant at the event wrote afterwards.

“This was a very enjoyable evening with a great performance in a lovely setting, and in the company of good people.  Thank you for this.  From beginning to end we enjoyed every minute of it. I can’t say this enough.  After the previous jazz concert in Budapest in April I told Robert that I felt simply as if something good had happened to me.  It was the same now. A good thing happened that I would gladly repeat anytime and eagerly recommend to my friends. Both Kyle’s thoughts and listening to the music gave me the feeling several times of being “found”.  It has been said that one does not live on bread alone.  This is really true.  An evening like this, and conversations like these just confirm this.  Pausing, listening, paying attention, reflecting and interacting, all of these elements were in the programme.  The surprise handout of discussion questions on the 10 insights of jazz as a conversation, was a great idea.  In this way the thoughts and questions raised by Kyle and transmitted through the music could linger a little longer in the air, and they also triggered meaningful group conversations.  I think this was the point.  And Kyle and Balázs presented this very nicely in their music. The sharing of thoughts, listening, attentiveness, reaction and response – insofar as these are present, what we end up getting is real harmony. It would be great if things were always this easy.  Thank you very much.” (Peter)

“Nagyon kellemes este volt, kiváló előadással és kedves társasággal, nagyon szép helyen.  Köszönet érte. Az elejétől a végéig, minden percét élveztük. Csak ismételni tudom magam. A múltkori Jazz-est után is azt mondtam Robertnek, hogy egyszerűen csak úgy éreztem, hogy egy jó dolog történt velem. Most szintén. Egy jó dolog, amit szívesen megismételnék bármikor és jó szívvel ajánlanám a barátaimnak. Mind Kyle gondolatai, mind a zene közben többször “találva” éreztem magam. Írva van, hogy nem csak kenyérrel él az ember. Valóban nem. Egy ilyen este vagy beszélgetés ezt csak megerősíti. Megállni, meghallgatni, figyelni, elgondolkozni és beszélgetni, ezek mind benne voltak a programban. Különösen jó ötlet volt a meglepetés kérdőív. Így a Kyle által felvetett és a zene által továbbított gondolatok, kérdések kicsit tovább maradhattak a levegőben, ami a csoportokban jó kis beszélgetéseket indított. Azt hiszem ez volt a lényeg. Kyle és Balázs nagyon szépen bemutatta ezt a zenében. Gondolat megosztása, hallgatás és figyelem, reakció és válasz, amennyiben ez mind meg van akkor amit kapunk az harmónia. Jó lenne, ha mindig ilyen egyszerűen menne. Köszönöm szépen.” (Péter)

 

3 Comments

  1. Mary C

    A wonderful article about an obviously beautiful evening! I loved the list of The Jazz Way for Conversation, especially two points…waiting and leaving space for others and looking for conversation partners that care more about the music than the prominence of their role. Thanks for sharing!

  2. jkylegregory

    It was a great pleasure to share this conversation with such generous-hearted people.

  3. Dan

    Kyle also offered a great concert in Spain recently with music by Monk and Gilberto. The audience was very enthusiastic and the words he shared on listening with ears of a child were inspiring.

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