How to start a Nexus group

In exploring existential life issues, we always build on the raw material of the participants’ actual life stories and experiences. We use diverse means to shape a shared encounter (a story, a song, a film, a poem, a defined life issue, etc.) and then open a conversation between that expression and our own lives. The big adventure is that we don’t know where this will take us. This simple two-step process, from encounter to conversation, characterizes every Nexus event.

In our experience to date, there are two primary ways of starting groups. One path is to invite a number of people individually — friends and friends of friends — to a defined group meeting. This will always be more formal. It helps to build the initial invitation on a genuinely shared interest, something you yourself and a few friends like to do. Because of the uncertainty it may create, it helps to propose a limited number of times to meet. After the final event, the group can evaluate together if they want to continue. A related possibility is to invite people to an ongoing group as a follow-up to a larger, one-time, Nexus event, built around a relevant theme or interest.

A second way of starting a group is more informal. We start with simply doing something together with a friend or two. It may be to watch a film, see a museum exhibition, listen to music, discuss a book, etc., and then to talk about what was experienced together. If the time together felt rewarding, we might suggest doing it again. We may know other friends who might like to join us. Gradually, what began as an evening or afternoon shared by a few people may grow into a group that fills a room.

In most contexts, getting together once a month is a sustainable rhythm. Fixing a specific time of the month can also be helpful for creating continuity, making adjustments as needed for holidays. A regular rhythm builds momentum. Clear communication, setting dates far enough ahead of time, and providing a gentle reminder the week before, helps encourage everyone’s availability. The quality of the experience is much more important than the quantity of people involved. A handful of people around a single table are enough to shape a meaningful conversation.

Maintaining a group requires a sustained commitment from a small team of two to four people who are willing to champion the Nexus idea. We trust that as people taste the value of the Nexus experience, they will show up for one another.

If you would like help in launching a Nexus group among a local group of friends, and friends of friends, we would be happy to help you get started. Please contact us